Follow along with our trip down the Patuxent
We'll be posting photos and stories from our adventures at Jug Bay as often as we can. Please feel free to add your comments and stories from the week below!
Thursday, Day 3
8/10/17
This is the gruesome story of a shady type of camp whose name has originated from the few survivors of "prison camp
Kimberly sung in a high pitched voice until we had awoken from our thick slumber. We tripped through a not so Amazonian jungle in search of purple flowers. All we had as protection from thorny plants and airborne menaces were hot sweaty swamp-prison ware. After an hour of his torture we were released and told to swim back to camp. The water was freezing and hyperthermia was setting in when we finally arrived back at torture camp and were ordered to clean. Under male inmates housing where the brutal remains of an unfortunate mafia murder of a turtle. We were loaded onto boats and paddled through the scorching hot sun suffering 3rd degree burns and extramarital exhaustion. Along the way Jo Mama had to give MD the heimlich because she was given toxic gum. Luckily she lived. Halfway through the trip suggs@mappz and Sully crashed into kit Kat and zackattack capsizing their boat. Don't touch the meat and King of hyperbole displayed their amazing muscle and fixed their boat. When we landed we were forced to carry our boats up steep hills then were frog marched down to a cream colored dock were we were pushed into the water and carried far downstream by the amazing current. We had nowhere to go and had to swim against the powerful waves back to the dock. We trudged up the rolling hills and served our prison guards dinner. The last night was coming to an end, and that's when Suggs@mappz broke a stick over his head trying to start a fire he started getting dizzy he said he was seeing things. Then he turned into a zombie!!!
8/10/17
This is the gruesome story of a shady type of camp whose name has originated from the few survivors of "prison camp
Kimberly sung in a high pitched voice until we had awoken from our thick slumber. We tripped through a not so Amazonian jungle in search of purple flowers. All we had as protection from thorny plants and airborne menaces were hot sweaty swamp-prison ware. After an hour of his torture we were released and told to swim back to camp. The water was freezing and hyperthermia was setting in when we finally arrived back at torture camp and were ordered to clean. Under male inmates housing where the brutal remains of an unfortunate mafia murder of a turtle. We were loaded onto boats and paddled through the scorching hot sun suffering 3rd degree burns and extramarital exhaustion. Along the way Jo Mama had to give MD the heimlich because she was given toxic gum. Luckily she lived. Halfway through the trip suggs@mappz and Sully crashed into kit Kat and zackattack capsizing their boat. Don't touch the meat and King of hyperbole displayed their amazing muscle and fixed their boat. When we landed we were forced to carry our boats up steep hills then were frog marched down to a cream colored dock were we were pushed into the water and carried far downstream by the amazing current. We had nowhere to go and had to swim against the powerful waves back to the dock. We trudged up the rolling hills and served our prison guards dinner. The last night was coming to an end, and that's when Suggs@mappz broke a stick over his head trying to start a fire he started getting dizzy he said he was seeing things. Then he turned into a zombie!!!
Wednesday, Day 2
8/9/17
I'm going to tell you a story of 9 kids, two counselors, a Sasquatch, and the river from hell. Viewer Discretion is Advised. Don't read at night in front of a campfire or bad things will happen.
Today was hard. Like really hard. The inferior men did a bad and put their rainfly on wrong and all sorts of liquids leaked in their tent. Wow. How could you be that ding dang dumb. As we woke, team taxes made a hearty breakfast of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and blueberry muffins with bleach to wash down the precooked hard boiled frog eggs. In the future, Hairy Poppins took the Aqua Thugs out on a tour of his river crib. On the water we saw his bae hummy the hummingbird's kids. After creepily staring at the babies like sick stalkers, tents were packed and artifacts were artifacted. We learned about Hairy Poppins's lost family, the beardie bunch. During lunch, we saw WASPS. ANGRY. SWARMING. WASPS. AMD THEY DRIED TO EAT US. So Randy Man, Speedy Gonzales, MD, and Matty B shot them down with their super soaker 3000s.
After lunch we had a blast from the past, and learned about the wonderous world of RKology. We went into an ancient abode, and touched a circuit breaker. Some of us were more entertained than others...
While on the river, the torturous team in the guide boat decided to race snails and ,with Katniss steering, sank the titanic... again! But they were not as bad as Speedy Gonzales and Matty B's boat, who played battleship with the rest of the fleet. The paddddddlers were starting to get "River Rage", while Hairy Poppins lagged behind the traffic jam to catch his fancey shmancy Pokémans and having deep meaningful conversations with his best friend River Dale Baptist the Frog. Luckily he had Zach King and MD the mafia 😱🔪😵🔫🙀 to keep him company. 79.2 magikarp later, he caught up with the rest of us, only to see that we have rafted up and were eating all of the rations. When we finally arrived in the land of no wifi, dun dun dun all of the snooty teenagers except Matty B and Joe Mama tried to sail away to the nearest Coscos. Unfortunately the titanic had taken one too many icebergs. Most of the team faced a watery demise and didn't come back the same. For dinner, team taxes 🤢made some food south of the wall, tico tacos 🌮. Unfortunately for Hairy Poppins, Joe Mama ate the last lemón James, so Hairy Poppins and his beard cried themselves to sleep. Illuminati confirmed. 🌚🌚🌚 After we landed, we attempted to sabotage our own ship, and sunk our selves instead. Now we are gathered around the campfire to sing our campfire song, and to share our feelings.
8/9/17
I'm going to tell you a story of 9 kids, two counselors, a Sasquatch, and the river from hell. Viewer Discretion is Advised. Don't read at night in front of a campfire or bad things will happen.
Today was hard. Like really hard. The inferior men did a bad and put their rainfly on wrong and all sorts of liquids leaked in their tent. Wow. How could you be that ding dang dumb. As we woke, team taxes made a hearty breakfast of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and blueberry muffins with bleach to wash down the precooked hard boiled frog eggs. In the future, Hairy Poppins took the Aqua Thugs out on a tour of his river crib. On the water we saw his bae hummy the hummingbird's kids. After creepily staring at the babies like sick stalkers, tents were packed and artifacts were artifacted. We learned about Hairy Poppins's lost family, the beardie bunch. During lunch, we saw WASPS. ANGRY. SWARMING. WASPS. AMD THEY DRIED TO EAT US. So Randy Man, Speedy Gonzales, MD, and Matty B shot them down with their super soaker 3000s.
After lunch we had a blast from the past, and learned about the wonderous world of RKology. We went into an ancient abode, and touched a circuit breaker. Some of us were more entertained than others...
While on the river, the torturous team in the guide boat decided to race snails and ,with Katniss steering, sank the titanic... again! But they were not as bad as Speedy Gonzales and Matty B's boat, who played battleship with the rest of the fleet. The paddddddlers were starting to get "River Rage", while Hairy Poppins lagged behind the traffic jam to catch his fancey shmancy Pokémans and having deep meaningful conversations with his best friend River Dale Baptist the Frog. Luckily he had Zach King and MD the mafia 😱🔪😵🔫🙀 to keep him company. 79.2 magikarp later, he caught up with the rest of us, only to see that we have rafted up and were eating all of the rations. When we finally arrived in the land of no wifi, dun dun dun all of the snooty teenagers except Matty B and Joe Mama tried to sail away to the nearest Coscos. Unfortunately the titanic had taken one too many icebergs. Most of the team faced a watery demise and didn't come back the same. For dinner, team taxes 🤢made some food south of the wall, tico tacos 🌮. Unfortunately for Hairy Poppins, Joe Mama ate the last lemón James, so Hairy Poppins and his beard cried themselves to sleep. Illuminati confirmed. 🌚🌚🌚 After we landed, we attempted to sabotage our own ship, and sunk our selves instead. Now we are gathered around the campfire to sing our campfire song, and to share our feelings.
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